My deepest, darkest secrets…
DO I REMEMBER!?
I don’t care about the freaking pot. That’s the easiest way I know how to explain grief.
I Stole a Car and Gave My Life To Jesus-Prove that He isn’t Real
Story Time from before, when I gave my life to Jesus. “I’m tired of you treating me like this! If you’re going to hit me, just do it already!!” “I’m tired…
If This Doesn’t Describe Your BF, Dump Him-My Biggest Fear
My biggest fear… I’m absolutely wild but he can still take me seriously. He says he loves me and means it. He shakes my Father’s hand and looked my mom in…
We’re Public People-Where the Heck I’ve Been
In the past, when the blog was down I continued writing. But when my Mom died, so did I, and so did the blog. I hardly wrote down anything for the…
Life Is Bitter Sweet-Holding The Family Together-I’m So Crazy About Him
I’ve been pushing off this trip for awhile. For many reasons. For one, my Mormor is ancient and extremely exhausting to manage. I love her to death but she’s like…
One Year Without Her- Neurological Damage and Therapy
I still feel the weight — a weight of exhaustion. It’s the feeling of responsibility, and of failing at that responsibility. “Give your burdens to the Lord,” can be easier…
The Wedding
It was raining. It was dreamy like every movie promises. It was far greater than the Pinterest board made when I was twelve. Our wedding was the best day of…
The New Chapter
I’m sorry to have startled you all with the sudden site take down. Mom passed away and I wanted to delete everything out of intense grief and desperation to get…
The Power of Grief – A New Chapter
It’s a source of regret that I never had the opportunity to share my blog with Mom. Among the many things mom won’t see, this one stings particularly because I…
The Engagement-Grief & Happiness-
Yes, you read that right! The day finally came; my boyfriend got down on a knee and asked me if I’d spend the rest of my life with him. It…
The Only Thing I Wanted-The Engagement is Off
Hey blog friends. I know a lot of my posts recently have been really depressing. That’s just life lately for me, but in this post I’ll try to be a…
Mom’s Cancer Story-Final Chapter
The doctors told us that mom has two/three months left. Her scan came back with five additional tumors in her brain. Dr. Is guessing that her body is full of…
How to Help Kid’s With Sick Parents-Mom’s Cancer Story-Fighting Melanoma
We’re at the hospital again. Mom had a seizure and fell in the kitchen this morning. This was her second seizure, except this time wasn’t because she didn’t refill her…
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A Provoked Child-Mom’s Cancer Story-The Family Dirt
An explanation/demonstration of why cheap grace/hyper-faith has ruined my family. For all of my life since day one, my family has had two options. But every time, they don’t just…
Hidden Feelings-I Burned His Love Letters-“She Isn’t You”
You might laugh at my “being such a dramatic girl” tendencies but what can you expect? You brought yourself here so don’t act so shocked. This is a white girl’s…
My Haters-The Truth Comes To Light-Anger Management
Live peacefully with all men. If it is possible, as much lieth within me… I repeat over and over and over. It helps. These are the things that changed and…
When Your House Is Haunted-Finally Moving Out
Well Blog fam. It’s time for a real post. A casual, “back to normal” post about moving the heck out of my abusive house. (If you’re not a part of…
The God Who Moves Mountains-Mom’s Cancer Story-Gag Me With A Spoon Why Don’t You?
I’m sorry for such a delayed post. You’re all probably hating me right now. Mom made it through, she’s okay. The surgery went according to plan, no mess ups. Doctors…
Our Last Chance-Mom’s 4th Brain Surgery-The Whole World Crumbles
I’ve been counting down the hours. We’ve hit literal rock bottom. At 1:30 they begin our last option. I’m not trembling. I’m not shaking with fear. I’m not a crumbling…
What Coming Off Steroids Is Like-Immunotherapy and Radiation-Mom’s Cancer Story
Mom’s first dose of Immunotherapy was yesterday. We haven’t had issues with the medicine, not anything that’s out of the ordinary. The doctors say it’s all going as planned. They…
What the First Week Of Radiation Is Like-Mom’s Cancer Story
Her radiation mask was made, dad’s insurance passed for immunotherapy, and we have two treatments behind us already. The doctor told us that her speech and memory declining daily is…
Stop Denying Affection-There Won’t be Enough Time to Make up for Right Now-
You’re 17 for only 365 days, and you could die at 18. When your mom asks you to sleep in her bed, say yes. One day she could be in…
God Is Not On Trial-Mom’s Cancer Story
Throughout all of Mom’s cancer, the past five years; from the first day she noticed a mark on her skin. God will not be put on trial. For everyone who…
The Scary Truth- What Cancer Really Looks Like-I Don’t Recognize Mom Anymore
Mom’s Cancer Story- Sunday, February 19th, 2023 In one month, mom’s brain tumor doubled in size. She thought her son’s name was September, seventeen, or cereal. She stared at the…
Another Friday Night In The Hospital- It’s the Same and It’s Different
Another Friday night in the ER. Another rushing from work to the hospital, crying in the car, praying for the same things. Mercy. The same text from dad, a picture…
Traffic Jam on The Blog-All of my Best Friends Are Out Of The Country-My Dream Coming To Life
OH, MY WORD! Did we seriously hit that?? I don’t like people knowing how many readers we have here. I don’t want it to change things AND if I start…
Mom’s Brain Cancer Story-Refusing Medicine Isn’t Faith-I’m Exhausted
I don’t recognize my parents anymore. Fried fish sticks for dinner, strange television preachers; awake at 3:00 am and asleep at noon. Dad sitting at the kitchen counter in the…
When You Can Really Say It- Owning Christianity-Mom’s Brain Surgery
I’ve lived stories that have proved Your faithfulness. I’ve seen miracles my mind can’t comprehend. There’s beauty in what I cannot understand. I believe, He’s the wonder working God, all…
Brain Surgery Part #2- Growing up in the Hospital
Hey! I’m back! It turns out that it wasn’t mom’s fancy church heels that were making her tired. On Tuesday we rushed her into the ER, her head started hurting…
When Mom Forgets How to Start the Microwave- Mom’s Cancer Story
Mom isn’t feeling good again. She keeps saying she feel’s “off.” She isn’t responding to texts very much which makes me think she isn’t able to. She had to ask…
Boyfriend vs. Guy Best Friend
It doesn’t feel like Christmas yet. It’s freezing cold, but no snow. The family is out of town on business again. The house is quiet which is nice for sleeping,…
Friends That Rip Your Heart Out-Mean Girls-Growing Pains
I went to get my boyfriend Chick-F-La on Friday and ran into some old friends. I was so surprised and happy to see them. We used to see each other…
I Think He Fell In Love With Me During The Blizzard-“First Kiss?”
I’ll probably just replay yesterday over and over. When the day starts at 4 a.m, you’re a little sleep deprived. You don’t know what quality time with your boyfriend is.…
She Barfed In My Hair-Don’t Let Life Slip Away Always Reminiscing
I spent the day yesterday at home with my little sicky. She was throwing up constantly. In her hair, car, garage; in her lap and in mine. She didn’t even…
Mystery Bouquet-Back to December-When You are In Love with Someone Else!!
Do you ever have those days where everything goes wrong? It doesn’t feel real, it’s like your life is a movie. Someone calls you first thing in the morning, complaining,…
What it’s like to Grow Up in a Hospital- Brain Cancer Almost Killed my Mom this Week.
It’s my mother’s birthday month and she’s been sick for all of it. She’s been a walking miracle these past two years. On January 31st, 2020; my mom was diagnosed…
The Blog Is Getting Too Much Traffic-I’m Taking It Down
Over the years, the readers have grown. They’ve grown up and grown in number. This place is special, because of YOU. It’s been six years already! Some have come and…
Vulnerability- How to Have a Serious Relationship-I Broke His Heart
Memorial weekend wasn’t as relaxing as I’d hoped. There were great moments but also devastatingly bad ones thrown in way too often. “Devastating” is a dramatic word, but it gets…
Back Up and Running- Welcome to the Blog.
I would like to announce that the Blog is back. You waited for it, and the time has come. Thank you to everyone who manages to stick around, even when…
Student Motivation-Nobody Can Help You
These thoughts replay in my head constantly. It’s the little things that add up-Read this when you’re feeling tired. 😵💫 When you get an assignment, schedule your studying now! When…
Ruin the Friendship-The Truth You’ve All Been Waiting For-“Singing Soccer Boy”
“I miss you so badly. And..I know you have a boyfriend…and I know you like him. Maybe even love..” The time has come for me to open up about a…
I Remember You, You Happened…Part 2
I felt relieved. I felt my throat closing and my chest tightening. I felt attached and unattached. I loved him for being alive. “Is it you?” he said. I sighed…
College Depression-Using the Christian Title-My Grandparents Have Covid
Life gets harder, people get worse; better, then turn on you again. They fall off the planet, become your best friend, betray you, etc. Sometimes life seems repetitive, days feel…
I Have To Get On That Flight- Part 1
I thought I had closed that chapter of my life. I thought I had built enough walls to stay away. Then I got the phone call that changed everything.
What Real Faith Will Do-When your Mom is Diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer-High School Diaries
Death and cancer, we’re all way too familiar with these words. I’ve never met someone who wasn’t effected and hurt by cancer. There are two ways you can respond. When…
He Asked Me To Marry Him and I Declined-Story Time
Many of you following along won’t stop pestering me about a topic I didn’t “properly close.” YOU ARE ALL MORE DRAMATIC THAN ME AND YOU WON’T LET ANYTHING GO!! I…
Why I Deleted 3 Years of My Life-Boyfriend Reveal
Hi. I had celebrated my sweet sixteen, finished up Driver’s Ed, and began experiencing the true excitement of life. A little taste of independence. I wanted to try/do as many…
Surprise 18th-I Don’t have to Be Your Boyfriend-“It’s Just A Bracelet”
06/29/19 Here’s the story… Our friend group of five went out for ice cream to celebrate the loss of Keegan’s last baseball game. (Keegan wants to be famous so I…
Young Love and Young Idiots-Why you Shouldn’t Date a Boy With a Yacht. Stay Single
I won’t be your prom date just to make “high school memories.” I won’t go get ice cream with you late at night because you have a Porch. I’m not…
When Your Dreams Become a Reality-Study Advice-Highschool Diaries
Someone pinch me! Guess who’s been getting school exceptance letters in the mail every day this week and two today? It’s adorable to see my dad’s smile when I get…
Meet Cute But “friends”
Story Time- This story takes place late at night in a High School. This is thrown together so read at your own risk. My team had a miserably long practice…
How To Get College Scholarships-The ✨College✨ Diaries
Welcome back to the College Diaries. I’ll be a Junior in HS this upcoming semester. I’ve been planning for college since I was in fifth grade. I found out a…
Fifteen Going on Sixteen-What a Teenage Girl Does
Hello future me. I’m starting this blog the weekend before my sweet sixteen for the purpose of documenting my life. This life is going to be WILD. I can tell…
The Secret Diary
Let’s Be Friends. Elainekateblog@yahoo.com